So I've signed up to Facebook. Buggered if I know why really. Growing feeling I'm missing something. However now that I'm on I'm fairly sure I'm not missing anything.

People seem to have lots of stuff on their pages but I can't figure out how to put up anything except for the basic info -books, films, blah blah.

So what's the secret? What's the magic [insert jazz hands here]?

Those in the know, please explain!

Is Twitter the stupidest thing you've ever heard of? I mean who has the fucking time?

I can't believe people are taking the time out of their day to say: "I'm on the loo." "Waiting at the doctor's surgery." "Picking the lint out of my bellybutton."

Is this information crucial for the wellbeing of the universe? Do people really need to know and, more importantly, do any of them really care?

On the first screen you see when you go to www.twitter.com [I am not promoting this tripe btw]there is a quote from someone or something called Wired "Incredibly useful". Really! How?

I am the first to admit that blogging is a silly indulgence and of no particular use to the world but Twitter is in a universe of useless triviality all of its own.

Also, am I the only person to never have looked at Facebook?