Jamie won. There is no god.

At least one mystery was solved. Who did he remind me of? The voice? The way of speaking? Derek Zoolander. Frightening. (Answer found on the Merrick and Rosso Breakfast Show on Nova FM this morning.)

It is always a weird sort of anticlimax when Big Brother is finished. As soon as the finale show starts so does that sinking feeling. It's all much ado about nothing at that point.

And there was certainly much ado last night. It's a lesson in how to drag approximately 10 minutes of entertainment into a three-odd hour "spectacular". Note to BB producers: less is more, people... less is more.

First a note about Gretel. I like the woman, no two ways about it. She's a fabulous older woman, gutsy and strong minded, on prime-time television. That's enough to like just there. But she really needs to stand up to those wardrobe people. Mostly they are not doing her any favours and last night was a prime example. A shiny silver ball gown and silver eyeshadow. No good. It was overdone by a long shot and the make up seriously made her look older (and no-one needs that, perhaps Nikky Webster?).

Then there was the horrendous bit of entertainment known as ex-housemate Danielle singing "Under the Radar" with the Big Brother "All Stars" doing the back-up dancing. Beyond silly. I don't have the vocabulary to describe how stupid it was. If I was the ex-housemates I would be checking and double-checking the fine print in my contract to make sure they really could make me do that shit. Obviously it was a very tightly worded contract.

Then there's Katie. All I have to say after seeing her last night is she must be missing a chromosome. Nothing else would explain the way she talks, acts and the sub-human look she gets on her face when she drops her jaw in that particular way. Jamie is no catch but I have to say "good luck, buddy".

What was most scary for me was the dream I had last night following the finale. It involved me and Jamie... no, god no, not like that. I had also been in BB and had been evicted (?) last night. Jason, the kids and I AND Jamie were all staying in the one hotel room after the final show. Jason and I kept tidying up and Jamie wouldn't help. I kept saying "see, look how lazy he is!". Then we decided to go home and I kept saying to Jamie "we'll be in Perth at Christmas time, we'll catch up then". I woke up with a horrible feeling and feeling quite disgusted with myself. I hope it isn't a premonition about actually seeing Jamie when we are in Perth. Sheesh, what a way to ruin a perfectly good holiday.

PS: "Big Brother Showdown 2006- Team Fag Hag vs. Team For God Sakes Pull Up Your Damn Pants" This is the funniest description of last night's finale I've seen (on http://betterthancheesecake.blogspot.com/2006/07/big-brother-showdown-2006-team-fag-hag.html)