You know what I hate?

When I post to an e-list and someone responds by nit-picking my post and putting words into my mouth. It really really really shits me!

If I read a post and I don't agree with the opinion expressed I normally ignore it. I believe it's not my place to try and change other peoples ideas and/or opinions, no matter how much I disagree with them. However, if I read something I agree with I will occassionally write a message of support or tie in my ideas with theirs.

The adoption world is so friggin' politically correct right now. As with all things the pendulum has swung to the other extreme and we have travelled the full spectrum from the bad old days when children weren't even told they were adopted to today when adoptive parents have to spend their lives apologising for having the gall to adopt their children and for potentially ruining their lives. What's worse is that adoptive parents have en mass swallowed this bullshit and are spouting it backwards and forwards at each other.

Don't get me wrong. I'm keen to learn and to understand all perspectives, good and bad. I want to be prepared for whatever may come up in my childrens' lives but I think us adoptive parents are driving ourselves nuts in the process. We're turning on each other, especially on the e-lists (the source of so much good and positive collective knowledge and support), almost as a way of showing that "I'm more politically correct than you", "I have a deeper philosophical understanding of adoption issues than you", "I'm more in tune with all sides of the adoption triad than you"... you get the picture. I am so over it.

I'll confess. I'm not a perfect parent. I probably suck as an adoptive parent. I'm not making them listen to Spanish language tapes as we drive, I don't make them watch their favourite movies in Spanish. I meant to take our son to Spanish playgroup but never got around to it. I'm just doing my best getting around the day to day stuff. Will that mean that he'll grow up as a poorly adjusted adult, struggling with identity issues and blaming the fact of his adoption for any problems his life may serve up? Maybe. Possibly. Really I just don't know. I really hope not! But I'm doing my best and that's got to count for something!