Dear Ryan O'Keefe,
I'm not sure how to approach this.
It's not you, it's me.
You know how much you have meant to me over the years. There is no denying that I have loved you deeply. Your marks, your tackles, your kicks, your tricky little ball recoveries. Each holds a special place in my heart.
But this year things have changed. You're a little slower, a little less agressive, a little less high flying. Sure your bum still looks great in those tight shorts. Maybe it's because you're married now; we all know married life takes it out of you. Maybe it's because you're no spring chicken any more; 28 is veteran territory in the AFL.
Let's be honest here. There's someone else. I've had my eye on Jesse White since the beginning of the season and today I just knew. He's the one. Just 21, fresh, fast and, oh, those high flying marks really set my heart a-flutter.
I hope we can be mature about this. Let's remain friends; say "hello" should we bump into each on the street. I'd like that.
Good luck with your future relationships. I'll always cherish our special memories.
P.S. Awesome game today.