Sunday, August 23, 2009

I think I may have made a terrible mistake.

Yesterday morning during a frenzied shopping sprint through my local Coles I bought the 6 in 1 Morning Fresh Power Tabs for the dishwasher (2 packets for $10). Imagine my horror when I got home and realised the Power Tabs I had been using were actually TEN in ONE. Oh. My. God. I bought the ones with FOUR less actions (no wonder they were on special).

So this morning I got out the old and new boxes to check exactly what four actions I would have to do without.

Apparently the 10 in 1 product includes these 10 very important dishwashing actions:

1) Dissolving wrapper (Huh? That's not an "action", it doesn't help in the washing of the dishes surely, simply a packaging description.)

2) Breaks down starch

3) Attacks proteins

4) Targets food thickeners

5) Cuts through grease

6) Leaves dishes sparkling

7) Protects glassware

8) Active oxygen

9) Fragrance

10) Stain penetrating action

Now correct me if I'm wrong but don't actions 2-8 plus 10 actually just translate to: cleans dishes?

The inferior 6 in 1 product is described as follows:

1) Enzyme action to break down food

2) Removes stains

3) Dissolvable wrapper (there's that friggin' wrapper again)

4) Cuts through grease

5) Leaves dishes sparkling

6) Fresh fragrance

Following on with this sort of marketing logic you could have a "2,000 in 1 action" tab:

1) Removes tomato sauce stains

2) Removes bbq sauce stains

3) Removes gravy stains

4) Removes chicken stains

5) Removes beef stains

.... you get the idea. Are these people nuts? Why is this marketing so cynical? Surely people aren't that stupid. Why can't products be what they are? Surely a tablet you put in your dishwasher to clean dishes should do just that, without the bullshit. It's not that they are lying, it's just that they are dazzling us with nonsense.

1 comment:

Kath Lockett said...

I love it - it reminds me of the 'new and improved' labels you see - how can it be improved if it's NEW?